People aren’t in our life just to make us happy, but rather to help us learn important lessons.
Why do we put our happiness on others?
The idea of people making us happy is rooted in our beliefs. That’s what we have seen our whole life around us. We may have seen it in our home. We see it in commercials. Our friends may say “I’ll be happy when I find someone”. We hear things from others, believe them, and take them as ours.
Why do we want to change these beliefs?
Unconsciously, we are experiencing things with others based on our needs, looking for validation, blaming others, and evading our responsibility. This puts an unfair burden on others and as a consequence, relationships don’t work. Sadly, these beliefs will make us repeat this pattern of leaning our happiness on others. Gladly, when we become conscious of this, we have the power to end this endless loop.
How do we change these beliefs?
It’s super important to recognize internally that personal happiness cannot solely depend on external factors or other people and true happiness comes from within. Nothing will change until you recognize that to yourself. This will allow you to take full responsibility for your life and what you want from it.
After this internal acceptance, start approaching relationships with a different mindset. Here you will find a list of some real approaches for starting relationships and connections with other people.
- Each person we encounter, whether a friend, family member, romantic partner, or even a passing acquaintance, has something unique to teach us.
- Some relationships will teach us pleasant and affirming lessons. They may bring us joy, love, and support.
- Some relationships may be more challenging and uncomfortable, pushing us out of our comfort zones and forcing us to confront our fears, insecurities, and unresolved issues.
- Some relationships are a mirror reflecting what we have inside and we are unable to see by ourselves.
- In any relationship, each person has 50% of the responsibility. No more nor less.
- Just as people are instrumental in our growth, we also play a role in their growth. Look at people with compassion and empathy.
Understanding all this will stop us from blaming others and thus start learning essential lessons. As a result, we can create more fulfilling and meaningful relationships based on mutual respect and support.
